Karthikeyan

An excerpt from the movie Ghost in the shell 1995. Major Motoko Kusanagi’s (A cyborg) words…
–
Just as there are many parts needed to make a human a human,
there’s a remarkable number of things needed to make
an individual what they are.
A face to distinguish yourself from others.
A voice you aren’t aware of yourself.
The hand you see when you awaken.
The memories of childhood, the feelings for the future.
That’s not all. There’s the expanse of the data net
my cyber-brain can access.
All of that goes into making me what l am.
Giving rise to a consciousness that l call ”me.”
And simultaneously confining ”me” within set limits.
–

For a long time, I read Calvin and Hobbes everyday before sleeping. A good way to end the day. But the ten year collection got over a month back. Out of books, I bought “For the love of insects” by Thomas Eisner. Now, I read it in my free time and its a totally different world out there. I have long stopped watching wild life TV channels. I feel one spends 30 minutes watching an episode to get 5 minutes of information from them. You mostly get the adrenalin rush from watching a ‘deadliest animal in this whole planet’!. But in the book, the author elaborates on means by which discoveries were made, how a hypotheses is proven and dis-proven about an insect’s life and it doesn’t matter how deadly they are. You unravel the mystery and marvel at the complexity of insect life. The details were never this exciting and simple. You remember when you solve a tough problem and slowly and steadily you are reaching your aim and the excitment grows with every step?. It takes you through such experiences of the author, not always ending in great new discoveries, but the satisfaction in it. The book, I think surely achieves one of it aims, which is to create awareness about insect world. Whenever I see an insect now, I spend time analyzing what it is doing. I have this little knowledge about insects now that I don’t squash it or shove it away. Some time back I picked up this bug and noticed that they seemed to jump from my hand from the edge to the ground every time I pick them up. I guess they are already programed to know that they are light weight and a high fall doesn’t mean a hard fall.

I also read “Surely you are joking Mr. Feynman”. This book along with the one above, gives you new ways to think about day-to-day events. A colleague of mine mentioned that he always looks for books that change the way he thinks. These are those books.

Wrote an alsa driver sometime back and that has changed what I think when I listen to music with my headphones on. After all that work, I come home and plug my head phone. I start imagining numbers flowing from a file somewhere in the hard disk. I say to myself that its all numbers. All it does is hit your ear drums after going through the dac. I did all the testing with my headphone on. You see, while I am testing this audio driver, all I am doing in waiting for that glitch or pop sounds that come up. While configuring the codec mode and clock format, I am visualizing the data in numbers and the frame sync for the right and left channels. I also had to dump the audio data to verify if data is coming form the user space to the kernel space and then to the codec. All this has changed the way I experience music with my headphones on! Apart from all that, for the first time, I got to hear my work sing to me!

And I saw the anime movie ghost in the shell  and ghost in the shell SAC.

Its cloudy most of the time in Bangalore except that it rains only a little. I don’t think its the weather and I am right now completely stuck on Naruto’s songs. Some lines from the songs.

Yellow Moon by Akeboshi:

All day yesterday
My cellphone’s call signal kept going off
An out-of-tune first guitar
In a strange park.

Wind by Akeboshi:

Don’t try to look so wise, Don’t cry ’cause you’re so right.. Don’t dry with fakes or fears… Else You will hate yourself till the end.

Inoue Joe’s Closer is also pretty good, not to mention Hero’s comeback and its video. One can get all the songs in mp3 at aimini.net.

There some characters in Naruto that can not be forgotten. Writing down some lines from a character by the name Itachi to his own brother:

“You are not even worth killing.“

“You are weak. Why are you weak? Because you lack … hatred.“

“Foolish little brother, if you wish to kill me, hate me, detest me, and survive in an unsightly way. Run, run and cling to life. And one day, when you have the same eyes as I do, come before me”

“People live their lives bound by what they accept as correct and true. That’s how they define “reality”. But what does it mean to be “correct” or “true”? Merely vague concepts … their “reality” may all be a mirage. Can we consider them to simply be living in their own world, shaped by their beliefs?”

“We are brothers. That is a unique bond. I am the barrier you must overcome, so you and I will continue to exist together, even if you hate me. That’s what being a big brother means.“

Pity I don’t have the powers to enforce a law make it compulsory for grown ups and kids alike.  I say watch it. Ending with Nagato’s dialogue:

“We’re both of the same breed, after all … motives for war are of no concern. Religion, ideology, resources, land, spite, love, or just because … no matter how pathetic the reason, it’s enough to start war.“

Three years back when I was given my birthday bumps, these were the words I had written down.

..I didn’t protest. I accepted the ritual. After having kicked me for half an hour to their hearts content, they let me free right near the hostel bathroom. The dirty bathroom floor became my bed… It was exactly in that place that I was born the second time …

Not completely a Shantaram style sentence but a word here and there will make it a close one.

As an aside, notice the post name. It is based on Naruto. The best of the cartoons(Anime) I have seen till now. Extremely Addictive. I first saw the entire Shippuden series (113). Then went back and saw the Naruto series(~200). Then read the whole manga(~450). Now I wait for the episode every week. I have never seen the personality of each character come out so well. I have never seen a cartoon opening like the ‘hero’s comeback’ of  the shippuden series. I have never seen anything like this before. It is a must see for every damn creature in this planet. And to top it all it is available in numerous sites dedicated just for Naruto fans.

Uttarkashi comes on the way to Gangotri from Yamunotri. The road from Uttarkashi to Gangotri is rough. Its is not a tar road but just the foundation stones and loose soil. Construction of Lohari Nag Pala dams has left over a lot of loose soil  on the road. Until the dam is contructed, there won’t be any smooth way.

On the way, I got to read Paths of Glory by Jeffrey Archer. Its been a long time since I read his book and I did not remember his style. The book is based on the life story of George Mallory. There was one quote that stuck with me. One does not need to be a pro climber to acknowledge it since I could relate too. It goes something like the following. Not exact though.

The irony in a mountaneer’s life is that after all the hard work of getting to the top, you only get few moments to stay on top.

I remember when I was there at Mulainagiri and at Kudremukh, I just had to push myself to leave the top so that we reach before it got dark. On both the occasions I had turned back one last time before leaving to have a look at the top.

One mistake I did was I tried to finish the book quickly in a day and tried to read it in the cab on that rough road. I fell sick because of that. I will never ever read again in a moving vehicle. Anyways I was able to do the honour an hour before I reached home.

The thing I regret was that we took a cab from Haridwar. My idea of going out is to know the place and people. There is no better way but to jump into the local buses, ask people arround for the way, get tickets from the conductor. I had expected to do that but this time, we were advised not to do so since there were some small landslides and that there could be road blocks that could last for two days. We had to take the cab if we had to finish it off in 5 days.

I am back to Shantaram now. The advice to Lin on why there is black market was small. Just that Rupee is a restricted currency and people always try to make more when they are made to conform and are restricted. Someone always comes up saying “Hey I have a better deal for you”. Thats it, nothing else. I am getting wary of his style of writing now. I am getting bored infact. I can exactly replicate his style while describing one of the events in my life… I had written a line long time back after I got the  birthday bumps at school. That, in the next post.

Returned from Gangotri and Yamunotri trip today. We first went to yamunotri and then to gangotri. Haridwar was our intermediate stop on our way to yamunotri and when returning from gangotri.

Yamunotri is a small temple wherein there is a hot spring which considered holy and people take bath in it. The water flowing down from the mountains is very cold. One will freeze in that. We satisfied ourselves by sprinkling some water on our head and body. Our hands got almost numb!.

Gangotri temple is located in the banks of Ganga. Until one stands in front of the main temple, one wouldn’t notice something very special about it. The temple is surrounded by imposing mountains on all the sides. I must say, there is no better place to choose for ganga’s maiya’s arthi. The height of the mountains reminded me of the lines from “zen and the art of motorcycle maintainance” on ego climbing and devotional climbing of mountains.

When you try to climb a mountain to prove how big you are, you almost never make it. And even if you do it’s a hollow victory. In order to sustain the victory you have to prove yourself again and again in some other way, and again and again and again, driven forever to fill a false image, haunted by the fear that the image is not true and someone will find out. That’s never the way.

A statue of shiva with his hair untied, outstretched arms, each muscle in his body visible, the unending mountains in the backdrop ensured my surrender as I stood at the center in awe.

More coming in an hour…

I visited Salem last weekend. My home town. I wanted to attend a marriage ceremony. Now, the reason I wanted to attend was that I had already missed one of my cousin’s. I made full preparation trying to recall the names of people I had met last time. I thought, this would be a good challenge for me. There is nothing else that I dread more than blinking at my relatives trying to recall their name when they can tell at least 4 facts about the recent events in my life. Though I should pat myself on the back for remembering almost everyone. The failure this time was this old lady who happens to be my mother’s uncle’s wife. I remember her very well now.

I am reading shantaram by Gregory David Roberts right now. I reached the chapter where Khaled gives Lin lessons on why the black market exists. I stopped after I read a para. I am preserving that section preparing myself before I read it. I am going to get a very different view point of why things are the way they are in the economy. A money lauderer’s viewpoint! Not the government’s banter about how wrong it is but why it is. More scientific and not opinionated.

I am a bit dissapointed with my todo list for this year. It has bungee jump in it. I don’t see that happening now. Its better if I am more responsible and not do it at least in india. Most of all, a person is no more. This blog has more to say about my day. I will add on a bit though.

1) When I registered, The organizers there just wouldn’t allow us to register for the next day. The argument was that there was no guarantee of the state of our health the next day and a medical check up must precede the registration. I was happy that they were taking safety measures. But it seems, that wasn’t enough.

2) I usually read all the useless stuff. But this time, I did not read the disclaimer I signed. I am assuming it would have said something like “allthough they follow the best safety standards, they are not responsible for any unfortunate event…”.

3) I did not notice any ambulance there.

4) May be there was something wrong with the procedure that was being followed. It should be corrected.

I don’t want to devote any more space to the incident.

I am switching to another topic.

I realized today that people with sun glasses irritate me. And if strangers talk with there glasses on, then I find it repulsive.

Remember this post about the well next to my house. Here is an update. Last month, I saw the water level in that well at arround 5 feet. And guess what, There was a tortoise, two fishes that were atleast 10 inches long (I did not see the fishes but people in my home) and a couple of eagles visiting the well everyday to chill out. Nice time pass for people in my home. But think about what’s going to happen as the water level goes down in Chennai’s summer. They are all going to fry. Leave the birds, they will survive. I wonder who played that horrible joke with those fishes there.

Try “Mirror’s Edge”. It’s awesome. I thought only shooting was fun in games. But this one is amazing. I am considering upgrading my desktop PC at home just for this one . And I have never played a game in good urban scenario in broad daylight. A look at the games wiki page says that it has a new lighting solution. I just know that lighting is just some value at the vertices of those polygons. Nothing about how to get those values. damn!

Apart from that I recently came to know of ways to optimize code by modifying code at run-time. Take a look at the man pages of mprotect or mmap and keep your eyes open for PROT_EXEC!

Enjoy!